Sunday, August 22, 2010

The "Trifecta of Terrible" (or just ironically funny)

Ya know, I am pretty happy with my life right now. I am employed at a facility that I believe in the message and mission of what we do. I am working (kinda - but not too hard) to lose the weight I have gained in the last nine months. I have gained some really wonderful friends over the last nine months and have reconnected with some terrific people that I knew in childhood (btw: Ronnie - got your message, your right and I honestly take your advice - have not had time to respond but I will - thx you, sir). Although I did not think it possible I have grown to adore my children even more (although I still wish I could see them more often). I am looking at graduate school and am committed to ensuring that I enroll. With the help and guidance of others I am at peace with where I am in life and where I would like to be heading. I have accepted responsibility for my actions without equivocation and have asked for forgiveness from those I have hurt. I am, I pray, headed in the right direction and although I know it will be a bumpy ride from time to time it is still the right direction. Then . . . it happens! Those events that let you know - yeah, the "goodness gods" still want to mess with you and just like celebrity deaths it comes in three's! (OK - yes, I am being funny and sarcastic - don't read into it!).

First, over the last few weeks at work one of my co-workers has been enjoying building a world and life for "Crockey" and his family. "Crockey" is a crocodile that, I would assume, was born in a toy factory (most likely in China) and migrated to the states to raise a family. Sadly, Crockey was "Crocknapped" and a ransom note was sent to the owner along with elaborate instructions. Thankfully the reptile has been returned. However, the issue here is that somehow I have been made a suspect in this devious adventure! OK; I admit that I am a bit of a prankster but - in the words of "Shaggy" - It wasn't me! Although, I do enjoy hanging out with "Crockey" - I would never stoop so low to rip a father from his family - geez, cut me some slack, people!

Me and "Crockey" in better days when I was not a suspect in the "Crocknapping" caper!

Now putting the whole - "rubber reptile for ransom" thing aside the second thing was the near loss of "freaky chimp" (to be referred to as "FC" from this point forward). Jacob managed to con me into (no, it wasn't that hard) getting him this little chimp that has light up eye's and makes a really odd and scary noise when it's button is pressed.

Jacob was enjoying "FC" (to the dismay of others) and while we were spending some time walking through downtown Dundee after dinner he decided to have a seat with "FC" on a park bench. Sadly, "FC" is very skinny and his (or her) butt was not big enough to maintain an upright seating position and "FC" fell through the bench and into the storm drain. (OK - yes, my first reaction was; "awww, sorry Jacob" all the while quietly and silently singing in my head; "Ding, dong the chimp is gone, the chimp is gone, the chimp is gone, ding dong the freaky chimp is gone"). Sadly, my euphoria of only lasted a mili-second as Jacob then looked at me, nearly in tears and exclaimed . . . "you gotta get him back"! The only think that would have made this moment any more like a Lassie movie would have been if he had included, "Pa" at the end of his statement. So, of course . . . I grabbed the storm drain and (thankfully) was able to pull it off and rescue the creature that I don't like; yeah me!



Then it came time to encounter the third thing that would make up, the "Trifecta of Terrible". Earlier in the summer I picked up a pool for the kids and put it on my back deck (concrete - don't stress) so everyone (yes, including me) could stay nice and cool. The first pool did not work out too well at my house as it was too big and decided to run, actually, roll away - rolling off the deck and down the hill toward the creek that runs behind my house! (Yes, it's funny - NOW - at the time, not so much!). So, I packed that one up and sent it to stay with the kids at Mom's house as the backyard there can accommodate it. I purchased another pool that has been wonderful till now.

The problem, really, isn't the pool but maybe me in this case. I have made it a habit of feeding the birds and cats that are in the area (OK - I live out in the country and there are cats - not mine, maybe not anyone - I don't know . . but, Hannah and I like watching them (actually, Hannah likes watching them and I like watching her) so I have been feeding them - clear enough?). Creating this "animal" haven has cost me and is the third in the trifecta. How is that, well, one of the local critter's must have needed a drink and thought that the hose to the pool was a nice place to get water! So, when we arrived home I found the pool draining out the hose from the "bite marks" left! Thanks - whomever (or whatever) you are!

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